Jan 25

In English we use exactly the same word to denote a sensory physical touch or sensation as for ‘feeling’ meaning emotional mood and experience. Although it is often the case that sensory feeling is accompanied by an emotional state, it is important that we clarify that the following use of the word applies to our emotions. Emotions can directly affect our mental health.

The basic emotions of a human being we know as feelings of contentment, happiness or joy, suffering or pain, sympathy, kindness, anger, envy, jealousy, compassion, irritation, fear, faith, anxiety, hatred, love, yearning, desire, and so on.  In each person these ingredients are developed and exercised differently to make up a different and unique recipe of emotions that define his individuality and which separate him from other people around him.  Many of the basic ingredients may be common but how these ingredients are blended is up to the choice of each individual. These familiar feelings or emotions may be cultivated and blended harmoniously or can be thrown together in a recipe which results in a chaotic and violent emotional disposition.

Untrained emotions are usually a hotch potch of emotional and often unconscious responses to one’s life experiences without having been sorted or cleansed to eliminate the negatives, which regrettably, often predominate. This state continues until the person grows discomforted in being always in anger, depression, fear or other unpleasant emotional states and uses his will to alter his mood.

To alter one’s emotional pattern requires time and patience do all efforts involved in self culture. Success depends upon our own clear goal and also a degree of friendly encouragement from others as we seek emotional equilibrium, a state that allows us to feel in a state where our minds can direct and control our feelings appropriately.

 

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Jul 22

It is easy to be aware of physical pain as a symptom of some disturbance of body function. It is natural to give it immediate attention so that we can return to the comfort zone that is physical well being.  If we have been physically injured Nature demands time in order to mend damaged tissue, bone or nerves. We need time to recover from any hurt inflicted upon us from outside.

When someone hurts our feelings, and this is perhaps the most common injury, it is likely to demonstrate symptoms of emotional upset. This can range from tearful episodes, anger, seething resentment or violent reactions that can cause aggressive behavior or retaliation.  We can also brood about the hurt, or try to resolve the cause by discussion. When it is extremely serious, we can allow depression or even despair to take away our ability to enjoy life.

But if we follow nature’s way we allow time to heal, to restore our positive emotional state and self confidence. This is the best way. And with all healing, it just can happen, sometimes magically, if we place trust in the natural process and give ourselves time to decide how to act. We should refrain from reacting too hastily.

There are also occurrences so traumatic that they damage us physically and psychologically to extend our pain and suffering for a lifetime if we do not find a remedy.

We must find the courage to face or acknowledge the unique causes and hurtful experiences if we are to become free of them to feel whole and happy inside. Acceptance, forgiveness, understanding are valuable tools.

In matters of the heart we must be free of trying to equate or measure affections in relationships. We each love according to our quality of affection, our capacity and in our own unique way. Our love is a gift given to be accepted or rejected by others. We cannot bargain with our heart or demand something another cannot give.

It is often true that when you suffer emotional hurt from another, it is not so much their deliberate intention to hurt but their actions are sparked by their own uncontrolled emotions.

The only positive result of our experience of emotional pain is a determination never to inflict the same hurt upon someone else.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions. Read more…

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Jun 30

We all love to laugh in a cheerful response to a humorous situation, word, image, enactment or even our own thoughts.

Some days we don’t seem to be provided with any stimulus where laughter would be appropriate. There are days when we don’t laugh at all.  These are also the days that don’t seem to be our good days.

Our best days are when we have enjoyed good company and exchanged interesting conversation or ideas, when we have smiled and laughed in sincere good humour.

There of course can be negative type of laughter  associated with anger, frustration, cynicism or even cruel feelings but genuine laughter is motivated by genuine joy and pleasure.

We all find that socially popular personalities are able to cheer others up by their comic attitude, witty speech, talent for telling jokes and getting the bottom line right, and by expression of their positive, outgoing character.

The old saying “Laugh and the world laughs with you, weep and you weep alone..” is very true. Laughter is fortunately ‘catching’ and a few people experiencing spontaneous laughter can make others join in the experience, even though they have no idea of the original cause for mirth.

Group laughing sessions are trendy in some societies. The purpose is to give vent to emotions that help us to feel in a good, positive mood. Such therapy groups are becoming quite popular.

To keep cheerful in spite of no one around who is a natural comic or who can ,by habit, be able to make fun that gives you a chance to smile or laugh, is more difficult.  But we have to be able to cheer ourselves up, nevertheless.

To keep a simple image nearby in our home or office – one that makes us smile when we see it, is a great help in keeping our sense of humour sensitive  and our minds aware of life’s pleasant moods and perspectives.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions. Read more…

 

 

 

 

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Jun 13

It is not often in early life that we are encouraged to undertake training of our emotions. Perhaps a little restraint over the negative ones and unconscious encouragement of our finer one is the common experience in early home life as we respond to outer circumstances and whatever family life teaches us.

 We are not aware of the power that emotions have. They can steer us to future happiness or to damage our healthy intellectual development or interfere with our mental fitness as well as our physical well being.

Our emotions are usually left to develop as the individual matures. Adolescence years determine a stage towards acquiring emotional independence, instead of continuing previous patterns and values. So we begin to determine emotional expression and desirable or appropriate behaviour for ourselves.

However, throughout life we all need to discourage the negative and control any destructive feelings in our emotional life. Opportunity for deliberate emotional control comes to us after life experiences serve to demonstrate the destructive potential of emotional energy. We learn that a few moments of uncontrolled emotion can destroy years of previous effort and fortune.

If we wish to freely develop our intellect, we must have our emotions under control and definitely on side so that mind and feelings are co-operative.  If we are not able to rely upon stable and vital emotions, we will never be sure that negative feelings and responses will not rear up to damage our life or enterprises in some way, particularly in regard to relationships.

Our emotions, particularly the finest emotions, also require nourishment in order to grow through the kindness and understanding of others.  

Negative feelings tend to grow as easily as weeds in our nature if we do not undertake constant cultivation in order to keep them under control. Finally we hope to eradicate them from our personality so that we can happily, lovingly and intelligently enjoy life with peace of mind knowing a healthy state of emotional and mental health.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions. Read more…

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Jun 13

Just as we have to exercise and look after our own physical health, each of us is responsible for our own emotions – their expressions and restraints.

The emotions are strong and many a time will win in any conflict situation between thought and feeling.  So we have to maintain a co-operative team situation in recognition of their mutual importance yet retain the mind in the role of manager.

Many of us were not well informed in our youth of the importance of emotional energy.  Schooling frequently is focused upon intellect and thinking capacity and failed to point out

that the secret of life success lies in our emotional energy. Our emotions provide the vital key to success or can destroy our opportunities and bring our career to ruin.

Many a person who is successful in the art of living, both materially and spiritually, will admit that their enthusiasm was an important ingredient. They will tell us that they had to learn how to govern their emotions and channel them positively and that it was hard work.

As sporting skills serve as one arena to train in physical control and development, so our daily life offers us a constant training ground for our emotions. There is not a day goes by but we have a chance to exercise positive emotions of peace, joy, love and affection, optimism and enthusiasm in our work, or in our appreciation of nature and good fortune.  Equally we have to exercise restraint to curb angry responses, impatience, anxiety, greed or selfish desires.

What is that part of your consciousness that is aware of how you really feel; seeks to upgrade any poor emotions; cultivates all your good and loving emotions and seeks to direct this energy constructively to a happy outcome?

 It is your own mind.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions. Read more…

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Jun 10

Our emotions or feelings have a wide range of mood from sympathy, suffering, compassion and affection to envy, anger, hatred and many other less pleasant, negative expressions.

 Positive emotions are those that activate our best aspects of our personality or soul. To experience these brings us contentment, happiness, love and peace. All these feelings can inject a special quality into events and experiences. We will all remember the happy moments in our lives when our finest emotions were heightened. Many of these will have arisen spontaneously. Although it is possible to consciously generate certain degrees of feeling, we usually learn that we cannot use our will to bring us a repeat of those feelings.  Only an echo of them comes through our memory and we are reminded that it is possible to experience such ‘highs’ again.

 We all develop our emotional nature not only according to our innate inclinations, but in conjunction with the environment and circumstances to which we react. The most wholesome emotions are those well known to us when it is our heart that speaks to us, rather than our head.

 We readily accept that anger, fear and jealousy result in disturbances to our psyche. When we are feeling envious we feel uncomfortable. When we are lonely, it is only a step away from giving way to depression. Negative feelings are difficult to live with – in ourselves or in those around us.

 On the other hand, we feel good when we feel happy, and cheerful. Like a magnet, we will feel attracted to those who have a positive, outgoing nature.

 So we need to cultivate our emotions as we do our thoughts. To alter one’s emotional pattern requires time and patience do all efforts involved in self culture.  For us all, our discipline involves restraint in curbing anger and irritation, and all negative traits and consciously exercising the positive feelings that will help us to be inwardly in a harmonious and peaceful state where we can identify ourselves with all that is good and noble. The rewards are great and will endure for our lifetime.

We will know love, happiness and the joy of living because our minds will direct our emotions to this end.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions. Read more…

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May 21

Smiling can be for some of us a real discipline. We may have to remind ourselves many times during the day to wear a pleasant expression instead of showing anxiety or concern on our face. You may like to try the simple smiling exercise that can be a bit of fun also.

Start your day with a smile. Even if you only smile at yourself in the mirror it will set the tone for a cheerful day ahead. Better still if you can greet others in the home with a sunny “good morning!”

The smiling exercise will take your awareness throughout an entire day, even though you are not expected to maintain a smile throughout!  But when you have a choice, smile with your eyes and your lips when you are relating to others. Observe their reactions. They will respond in surprising ways.

This is most evident when you walk down the street and try to make eye contact with those approaching you so that they see you deliberately smile at them as you pass by.
Some will be jolted into looking back to see if they should have recognized you. Others immediately respond without thinking about it and give a ready smile in return.

But some are perplexed as to why you would want to smile at them and this is a sad reflection on a general lack of cheer.

Mothers with infants tend to show some concern in not letting strangers show an interest and demonstrate a degree of mistrust.

Sometimes a woman avoids eye contact with a man and some men are embarrassed to have a woman smile at them. Others react to any spark of interest shown in them.

Try it out. You will find it a rewarding experience and possibly help others to remember to smile more often to lighten the day.
…………………….

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The complete Self-Help Guide”, offers simple and timely solutions. Read more…

 

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Dec 11

Philosophers tell us that free will of a human being gives an individual the power to determine not only his actions, feelings and thoughts, but whether we will choose to assume an attitude to life that determines our future happiness.

If we are patient and relaxed enough to admit to ourselves the reasons for any unhappiness it will cause an unravelling of any negative knot or stranglehold within our psyche. This can refer to either emotional issues or to mental problems that preoccupy our thoughts and disturb our mental fitness. Even if the cause is not immediately apparent, we really may know the answer, although it may be at present buried in our deeper unconscious mind waiting for us to discover the key.

So sometimes we must be patient, and keep searching for the answer so we can dissolve our dissatisfaction or unhappiness and transform it into positive energy. This may results in a more relaxed state, a general acceptance of things we can’t change or improve, feeling of contentment, or better still, just the feeling of joy and happiness in being alive. Read the rest of this entry »

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