Stranded on the shores of knowledge of the intellect alone, we eventually find ourselves lonely and devoid of real life satisfaction and experience regardless of our accumulation of information.

If we should choose to depend upon our emotions and consciousness of our hearts alone, we soon learn that we need the mind to channel our affections and sympathies appropriately.

We may pay lip service to the importance of the heart and soul but are inconsistent in our references and often suffer some confusion in identifying how to apply this aspect of our nature.

It is not by alternating between our thought activity and our emotional states but by a blending.   We come to realize that it is only the harmonious cooperation between our minds and hearts that will produce the faculty we should cherish – that of ‘common sense’ where the two spheres are blended.

Common sense is capable of serving us as a good friend and guide through the maze of events and circumstances of our lives and throughout its duration.

There are frequent times in our lives when we place more emphasis upon either mental pursuits or emotional needs and perhaps are left wondering which sphere of our intelligence we should listen to – our thoughts or our feelings. It is likely that there are times where our mind says one thing and our emotions another and we must make choices.

In this, it may help to recall that the knowledge of the mind is ever active, changing and growing in our search for truth.

The knowledge of the heart, where the deeper knowledge of life experiences and wisdom resides in stillness is related to our enduring, immortal soul and our capacity to love.

Our feelings are often motivated by thought and directed by them.

We can entertain an idea that is purely intellectual as a product of thinking alone.

We can entertain emotions without any instruction or control of our minds.

However, the general understanding of the human psyche is that we are all a confused mix of both thought and emotion.  This would seem to be the case and along with any effort in self understanding and self culture, we are responsible for sorting out the mix.

In fact our feelings function through the heart where of all possible human emotions, love rules as the supreme feeling. But we can also hold less admirable emotions of hatred, jealousy and destructive feelings in our psyche. We must be honest in recognizing any negative feelings and overcoming them or pulling them like weeds unwanted from our being so that loving kindness and cheerful states, the positive and powerful ones, can be experienced. Each of us must face this task.

Our mental faculties function in a different sphere from the emotions and are anchored within the brain. The brain certainly acts as a transmitter of our thoughts that are generated within the invisible and subtle mind consciousness. How to clear out unwanted or disturbing thoughts to leave the mind capable of conceiving bright ideas and experiencing good humor is a little more difficult. There are many techniques outlined by many authors. The most successful are those that work in tandem to overcome the negative by replacement with a positive thought. We must choose a method that suits us.

In order to evaluate mental energies and emotional ones we must agree on two principles. One being that our thought is the faculty that is responsible for disciplining our emotions when necessary. The other, that our emotions and feelings are needed to add enthusiasm and bring life to any idea or creative project. Thought and emotion best serve us when they work in co-operative and harmonious agreement.

It is self destructive to allow our own minds and hearts to be in conflict. When we have a thought that is opposed by the way we really feel, then it is most common that the emotions will tend to come out on top until we have achieved some level of integration or agreement in the relationship.

It is often a matter of degree of non-alliance and often of no real consequence. For instance if our sensory appetite reaches out to enjoy a delicious chocolate and we succumb in spite of our thought saying ‘no’ we live with the consequences, of this or any other involvement of choice.

When we encourage and generate good emotions and feelings these enrich and empower our thought and give us the enthusiasm and the motivation to succeed and reward us with the ability to feel joy in achievement.

When someone hurts our feelings, and this is perhaps the most common injury, it is possible to endure symptoms of emotional upset, tearful episodes, anger, seething resentment or violent reactions that can cause aggressive behavior or even impulse to retaliate.

We can brood about the hurt, try to resolve the cause by discussion or when extremely serious, allow depression or even despair to take away our ability to enjoy life. But if we follow nature’s way we allow time to heal, to restore our positive emotional state and self confidence, this is the best way. And with all healing, it just can happen, sometimes magically, if we place trust in the natural process and give ourselves time to decide how best to act. We need to let our emotions settle down after any occurrence which gives us pain.  Severe suffering of bereavement for instance is well known to take two years.

Mental pain is not so immediately demanding to the extent that we can go for days, months, even years avoiding the issues or without finding a remedy to take away our mental injuries. If our long unhealed psychological states or traumas are left unresolved they are likely to flare up to be the cause of acute and inexplicable moods, anxieties or settle into depression. It requires a strong and positive attitude if we are to find our usual quiet, safe place in our minds and regain our seat of self control, self determination and even self confidence.

However we have the gift of free will that gives us a choice to respond or to refrain from reacting in any way to a situation or to someone else. When we allow an unthinking or instinctive response we are no longer in control. We place ourselves in the role of victim. We soon discover that if we want to hit back and hurt, it inevitably will lead to more conflict and aggression. Neither do we want to brood over the hurt or wallow in self misery as the victim of a situation.

There are also occurrences so traumatic that they damage us physically and psychologically to extend our pain and suffering for a lifetime if we do not find a remedy. We must find the courage to face or acknowledge the unique causes and hurtful experiences if we are to become free of them to feel whole and happy inside. Acceptance, forgiveness, understanding are valuable tools.

When someone hurts our feelings, and this is perhaps the most common injury, it is possible to endure symptoms of emotional upset, tearful episodes, anger, seething resentment or violent reactions that can cause aggressive behavior or impulse to retaliate.

We can brood about the hurt, try to resolve the cause by discussion or when extremely serious, allow depression or even despair to take away our ability to enjoy life. But if we follow nature’s way we allow time to heal, to restore our positive emotional state and self confidence, this is the best way. And with all healing, it just can happen, sometimes magically, if we place trust in the natural process and give ourselves time to decide how to act.

Mental pain is not so immediately demanding to the extent that we can go for days, months, even years avoiding the issues or without finding a remedy to take away our mental injuries. If our long unhealed psychological states or traumas are left unresolved they are likely to flare up to be the cause of acute and inexplicable moods, anxieties or settle into depression.

It requires a strong and positive attitude if we are to find our usual quiet, safe place in our minds and regain our seat of self control and self determination and even self confidence.

Remember, it is our choice to respond or to refrain from reacting in any way to a situation or to someone else. When we allow an unthinking or instinctive response we are no longer in control. We place ourselves in the role of victim. We soon discover that if we want to hit back and hurt, it inevitably will lead to more conflict and aggression. Neither do we want to brood over the hurt or wallow in self misery as the victim of a situation.

There are also occurrences so traumatic that they damage us physically and psychologically to extend our pain and suffering for a lifetime if we do not find a remedy. We must find the courage to face or acknowledge the unique causes and hurtful experiences if we are to become free of them to feel whole and happy inside. Acceptance, forgiveness, understanding are valuable tools.

If we can remain strong enough to either distance ourselves physically, if that is appropriate, or to have a little quiet time to come to terms with our feelings it is better than regretting any over reaction. We can do this by retreating to take ten slow, deep breaths before making a conscious choice.

Mental attitudes can help us. We may accept bad circumstances or experiences to be our bad fortune, or to be symbolic of karmic lesions still to be learned. We may focus upon the spiritual teachings that tell us to refrain from hurting our fellows, even if we are hurt by them.

Yet still we can be forgiven in having a natural common query as to why someone would want to harm or hurt a nice person like you! This may never be answered.

So, remember to take those 10 deep breaths and move on!

To a degree our emotions seem left to develop as we grow up and adolescence years offers a period of acquiring emotional independence, instead of continuing the patterns and values of our family.  We begin to determine emotional expression and choose to adopt desirable or appropriate behaviour for ourselves.  Other people serve us by their example of what we see as positive qualities to develop and also by demonstrating behavior we choose to avoid.

We are not usually aware of the power that emotions have until we are more experienced in life. Then we rather dramatically learn that our feeling can prove stronger than thought and can steer us to future happiness and success or can damage our opportunities in our career and personal relationships.

We are forced to realize that we each must undertake to cultivate our good emotions and to employ our feeling nature appropriately.  Equally we have to discourage our fears and negative feelings that impinge upon our own inner harmony and the comfort of others.

If we fail to initiate our own personal self discipline, external circumstances will force us to become aware of the importance. We may learn that a few moments of uncontrolled emotion can destroy years of previous effort and fortune.

If we wish to freely develop our intellect, we must have our emotions under control and definitely on side so that mind and feelings are co-operative.  If we are not able to rely upon stable and vital emotions, we will never be sure that negative feelings and responses will not rear up to damage our life or enterprises in some way, particularly in regard to relationships.

Our emotions, particularly the finest emotions, also require nourishment in order to grow through the kindness and understanding of others. It is our good fortune to enjoy, or a disappointment, if this situation does not apply.

However, our own self culture is not reliant upon externals but upon our inner ideals and the self image to which we aspire. Most of us will choose to include desirable emotions that will result in peace, love, happiness and the joy in living..

The basic emotions of a human being we know as feelings of contentment, happiness or joy, suffering or pain, sympathy, kindness, anger, envy, jealousy, compassion, irritation, fear, faith, anxiety, hatred, love, yearning, desire, and so on.  In each person these ingredients are developed and exercised differently to make up a different and unique recipe of emotions that define his individuality and which separate him from other people around him.  Many of the basic ingredients may be common but how these ingredients are blended is up to the choice of each individual. These familiar feelings or emotions may be cultivated and blended harmoniously or can be thrown together in a recipe which results in a chaotic and violent emotional disposition.

Untrained emotions are usually a hotch potch of emotional and often unconscious responses to one’s life experiences without having been sorted or cleansed to eliminate the negatives, which regrettably, often predominate. This state continues until the person grows discomforted in being always in anger, depression, fear or other unpleasant emotional states and uses his will to alter his mood.

To alter one’s emotional pattern requires time and patience do all efforts involved in self culture. Success depends upon our own clear goal and also a degree of friendly encouragement from others as we seek emotional equilibrium, a state that allows us to feel in a state where our minds can direct and control our feelings appropriately.

When someone hurts our feelings, and this is perhaps the most common injury, it is likely to demonstrate symptoms of emotional upset. This can range from tearful episodes, anger, seething resentment or violent reactions that can cause aggressive behavior or retaliation.  We can also brood about the hurt, or try to resolve the cause by discussion. When it is extremely serious, we can allow depression or even despair to take away our ability to enjoy life.

But if we follow nature’s way we allow time to heal, to restore our positive emotional state and self confidence. This is the best way. And with all healing, it just can happen, sometimes magically, if we place trust in the natural process and give ourselves time to decide how to act. We should refrain from reacting too hastily.

There are also occurrences so traumatic that they damage us physically and psychologically to extend our pain and suffering for a lifetime if we do not find a remedy.

We must find the courage to face or acknowledge the unique causes and hurtful experiences if we are to become free of them to feel whole and happy inside. Acceptance, forgiveness, understanding are valuable tools.

In matters of the heart we must be free of trying to equate or measure affections in relationships. We each love according to our quality of affection, our capacity and in our own unique way. Our love is a gift given to be accepted or rejected by others. We cannot bargain with our heart or demand something another cannot give.

It is often true that when you suffer emotional hurt from another, it is not so much their deliberate intention to hurt but their actions are sparked by their own uncontrolled emotions.

The only positive result of our experience of emotional pain is a determination never to inflict the same hurt upon someone else.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions.

Some days we don’t seem to be provided with any stimulus where laughter would be appropriate. There are days when we don’t laugh at all.  These are also the days that don’t seem to be our good days.

Our best days are when we have enjoyed good company and exchanged interesting conversation or ideas, when we have smiled and laughed in sincere good humour.

There of course can be negative type of laughter  associated with anger, frustration, cynicism or even cruel feelings but genuine laughter is motivated by genuine joy and pleasure.

We all find that socially popular personalities are able to cheer others up by their comic attitude, witty speech, talent for telling jokes and getting the bottom line right, and by expression of their positive, outgoing character.

The old saying “Laugh and the world laughs with you, weep and you weep alone..” is very true. Laughter is fortunately ‘catching’ and a few people experiencing spontaneous laughter can make others join in the experience, even though they have no idea of the original cause for mirth.

Group laughing sessions are trendy in some societies. The purpose is to give vent to emotions that help us to feel in a good, positive mood. Such therapy groups are becoming quite popular.

To keep cheerful in spite of no one around who is a natural comic or who can ,by habit, be able to make fun that gives you a chance to smile or laugh, is more difficult.  But we have to be able to cheer ourselves up, nevertheless.

To keep a simple image nearby in our home or office – one that makes us smile when we see it, is a great help in keeping our sense of humour sensitive  and our minds aware of life’s pleasant moods and perspectives.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions.

We are not aware of the power that emotions have. They can steer us to future happiness or to damage our healthy intellectual development or interfere with our mental fitness as well as our physical well being.

Our emotions are usually left to develop as the individual matures. Adolescence years determine a stage towards acquiring emotional independence, instead of continuing previous patterns and values. So we begin to determine emotional expression and desirable or appropriate behaviour for ourselves.

However, throughout life we all need to discourage the negative and control any destructive feelings in our emotional life. Opportunity for deliberate emotional control comes to us after life experiences serve to demonstrate the destructive potential of emotional energy. We learn that a few moments of uncontrolled emotion can destroy years of previous effort and fortune.

If we wish to freely develop our intellect, we must have our emotions under control and definitely on side so that mind and feelings are co-operative.  If we are not able to rely upon stable and vital emotions, we will never be sure that negative feelings and responses will not rear up to damage our life or enterprises in some way, particularly in regard to relationships.

Our emotions, particularly the finest emotions, also require nourishment in order to grow through the kindness and understanding of others.

Negative feelings tend to grow as easily as weeds in our nature if we do not undertake constant cultivation in order to keep them under control. Finally we hope to eradicate them from our personality so that we can happily, lovingly and intelligently enjoy life with peace of mind knowing a healthy state of emotional and mental health.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions.

The emotions are strong and many a time will win in any conflict situation between thought and feeling.  So we have to maintain a co-operative team situation in recognition of their mutual importance yet retain the mind in the role of manager.

Many of us were not well informed in our youth of the importance of emotional energy.  Schooling frequently is focused upon intellect and thinking capacity and failed to point out

that the secret of life success lies in our emotional energy. Our emotions provide the vital key to success or can destroy our opportunities and bring our career to ruin.

Many a person who is successful in the art of living, both materially and spiritually, will admit that their enthusiasm was an important ingredient. They will tell us that they had to learn how to govern their emotions and channel them positively and that it was hard work.

As sporting skills serve as one arena to train in physical control and development, so our daily life offers us a constant training ground for our emotions. There is not a day goes by but we have a chance to exercise positive emotions of peace, joy, love and affection, optimism and enthusiasm in our work, or in our appreciation of nature and good fortune.  Equally we have to exercise restraint to curb angry responses, impatience, anxiety, greed or selfish desires.

What is that part of your consciousness that is aware of how you really feel; seeks to upgrade any poor emotions; cultivates all your good and loving emotions and seeks to direct this energy constructively to a happy outcome?

It is your own mind.

Sally Janssen’s wonderful book “Mental Fitness: The Complete Self-Help Guide”, offers timely solutions.